When we returned home from furlough, I hit the
ground running. While still in America, we got the thrilling news that my
Turkish sister Bahar was engaged. I got
back May 17th, with just five weeks to help Bahar prepare for her
June 23rd wedding. As the matron of honor, I fell into the roles of wedding
coordinator and mother of the bride, so it’s no wonder I’ve had no time for
blog posts.
The last five weeks were a time of:
JOY
I am overwhelmed by God’s faithfulness in answering
a prayer that I prayed every day for 7 years. I encouraged Bahar to wait for
God’s best, but sometimes I secretly doubted, “God, are you really going to
come through?” Seeing his faithful
provision of a wonderful man for Bahar gives me indescribable joy.
SETTING PRIORITIES
When we
returned to Turkey, I felt guilty for being more concerned about Bahar’s
wedding than about our church plant. It didn’t seem “spiritual” to leave aside
my “ministry” to work on a wedding. So it was freeing when my husband reminded
me that family and people are the most important ministry I have.
STRESS
Bahar had three events: a henna night, an afternoon
church wedding, and a Turkish style evening wedding. I helped with planning and
organization for the church wedding, gave a bridal shower for 30 women, and
took bridesmaids to dress fittings. I’d love to say that I was cool as a
cucumber, filled with peace and trusting God for every detail. The truth is I had moments of feeling overwhelmed
and spent a few sleepless nights with my mind racing over details of
decorations, programs, wedding favors, a church reception, and an RSVP list of
350 people!
SHARING
It was a privilege to share many special moments
with Bahar: going along with her to three dress fittings and helping her choose
flowers for her bouquet. These were
things she could have done alone, and my American self reasoned that since I
was already so busy with wedding planning, I didn’t have time for these. Luckily my Turkish self was stronger, and
reminded me that time spent sharing her excitement was what I would remember
later.
SERVICE
The last week before her marriage Bahar stayed with
us. My closet was crammed full with 3 wedding dresses--it’s a long story-- and
my daughter gave up her bedroom. Several mornings I accompanied Bahar on
errands, and I stayed up late nights. The night before her wedding, I cooked a
simple bridesmaids’ dinner. After kicking
everyone out at 10:00, I stayed up until midnight helping Bahar pack for her
honeymoon. My American self would have
said, “Since you waited until the last minute to pack, you’ll have to do it
alone. I’m going to bed.” My Turkish self said, “You cannot leave your
friend alone at a time like this.” I was
so glad later that I listened to my Turkish self; helping her pack her suitcase
is one of the sweetest memories I have.
IMPERFECT GIFTS
My lovely, crazy month culminated in a beautiful
wedding day. I’d like to say that I was
a model of service and sacrifice, but I wasn’t.
Sometimes I was stressed and grumpy.
As I dropped Bahar off at the hairdresser’s and helped her get dressed
on the big day, we snapped at each other, a cantankerous bride and an irritable
matron of honor who felt comfortable enough with each other to let our true,
grouchy selves show.
5 comments:
OH, I saw only beauty and I am sure God did too. What a gift you were to your beautiful friend.
What a wonderful friend you are! This is such an insightful, touching post. You and your friend look absolutely beautiful, too!
Blessings!
Glad to reconnect again. I know that the Lord used your time planning for the wedding even if it did not feel like 'ministry'. Agree a touching post-beauty can be shared in many ways.
so true, Olive Tree! though we are 'cracked vessels' may something of the beauty of our Maker radiate out, transcending our weaknesses.
great to have you back again! :)
Lovely, lovely. Thanks for letting us in on all those special events and thoughts and prayers. I especially appreciated you talking about your Turkish self and your American self. Bless you for your sweetness and your loving heart.
Linda
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